Does Sexual Preference Determine One’s Identity?

The first response is that the argument’s underlying assumption—namely, that a person’s identity is dependent on his or her sexual attraction—leads to absurdities. For example, would we use the same line of reasoning for a man who by no choice of his own is sexually attracted to children? Should we say his attraction is a part of who he is and thus his identity? Of course not!

We could use this same line of reasoning for any other sexual attraction that a person happens to have independent of their choice.

A second response is that the argument entails a false view of the human being, which is that our sexed bodies are not essential to our identity.

Notice the argument breaks the ties between sexual orientation and the natural correlation between the masculine and the feminine. The relation between one’s sexual orientation and the sexual polarity inscribed in human bodies becomes arbitrary and accidental (non-essential).

In light of this separation, if sexual “orientation” defines a person’s identity, then the sexual polarity of male and female is reduced to a sub-personal and material significance. Our sexed bodies become merely a material circumstance for living out our sexual orientation.

But this is not true. The sexual polarity that exists in the human body is essential to our identity. A defense of this claim goes beyond the scope of this brief answer, but suffice to say that when you read this answer, which involves your bodily powers of sensation, you are reading it. It’s not as if your body sees the words and your person understands it. No, you both see and understand.

Sexual attraction or “orientation” can’t determine our identity, because it presupposes our natural sexual polarity. Sexual attraction arises out of the natural sexual polarity inscribed in the body.

Nature intends first the biological correlation between male and female, which is constitutive of our identity, and then from that intends sexual attraction to correspond to such sexual polarity. So when a person is sexually attracted to a person of the same sex, for whatever reason, it is a disordered attraction.